Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
