Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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