i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
i think i just lost a toe
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Randomize
