Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
