Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
