There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
