We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I'd cum for enchiladas.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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