Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Randomize
