Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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