My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
