So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
