woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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