In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
