why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
