Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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