I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
