I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
