I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Randomize