I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
