I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
