she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Non-Jews are for practice
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Randomize
