That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
