White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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