my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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