is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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