So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
