i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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