I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
