Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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