We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
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