I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
