the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
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