I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
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