i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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