She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
