who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
