I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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