Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
My brain says no but my pants say off.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
