but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
