Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
someone owes me an orgasm
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Randomize
