You work out of a Hotel?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
