The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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