3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
