he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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