At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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