I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
ttyl tear gas
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
