mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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