New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Randomize
