I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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