Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Oh god it's open bar.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
